The answer is, in all its simplicity and all its complexity, that we change the system. Should be a snap, no? But seriously, changing the system is possible, simply because it is not impossible. That is what the Institute is working to do, and that is why I am so pleased to have you on board for the ride!
Hildy

BRAVO! Just like your article on Impossible Beliefs, I fully appreciate the sentiments in this article.

In the scope of my experience I would fully agree that releasing the foundational belief that we truly do not trust and believe in each other has been a challenge for our industry.

In fact, I venture to comment (from a place that is as personal as it is professional) that our industry does not exclusively hold the rights to perpetuating this way of being!

That said, I do know that it is work like what you and I are doing which is shining a light toward other possibilities. And one by one, others who are looking for that light are finding us (much like we found each other) and ARE joining in!

I guess a question I keep coming back to though, which I repeatedly use for myself as a thermometer is… What is my/our motivation? In other words, I find myself challenged to not only examine “what” I am doing, but “why” I am doing it.

I’m not usually one to get into the “why” questions much because they only wind up being crazy-making questions that lead backwards instead of forwards… And I don’t necessarily believe that everything that takes you back, leads you forward.

But in this case, I believe there is value in asking ourselves “why” this topic is even an issue at all.

If I may speak candidly, we can say that our motivation is about the bigger picture (mission, vision, values), and the impact we want to have in the community vs. just building a better organization to survive in the marketplace. And I have no doubt that you and I fall into that camp sincerely, and from a place of complete passion and integrity.

But at the crux, whether we are talking about the perspectives and beliefs of Coaches, Consultants, Funders, Resource Centres or Community Benefit Organizations (CBO’s), if we’re honest about the core belief that is simultaneously and jointly in operation, the one which circumvents all of our best intentions, at the core, it is about our motivation to “change” “the other guy”.

Think about it… How do you respond when someone presents themselves to you from the get go as wanting to change you? Because in their eyes, you just “don’t want to learn” or “refuse to change”? Because no matter how you slice it, that is what we’ve been communicating with each other…

The Boards and Staff of CBO’s want the industry to fundamentally change, and the Consultants, Resource Centres and Funders want the CBO’s to change…

There’s so much finger pointing around what we need the other guy to “do” first… the question is, who is going to see that when you point a finger there are three pointing back, and take responsibility for who we are “being” in the “now”?

There is a key distinction at play here… May I suggest that it’s less about starting to believe what boards are capable of learning, and changing into – a “doing” orientation… and more about (as you touched on) firmly and enthusiastically believing in their/our ability to, as Mahatma Ghandi said “… BE THE CHANGE we wish to see in the world” – and not just in the future, but as they are perfectly, NOW?

Hildy, you said “We all know the difference it makes in our own lives when we know there is even just one other person who believes in us”. And you cited movies around adults believing in children and how the public “eats that up”…

As much as we want to “hold the space of possibilities” for others to enter into, much like we do for a child (and, I might add, aren’t as quick to do with adults or especially organizations), what makes that space safe and appealing enough for ALL OF US to enter into, ultimately comes down to releasing the judgement…

On who we have been, and perhaps more specifically and importantly…

On how much we have given that history unconditional and undisputed power to dictate who we are being now, and who we have yet to be.

The question that begs to be answered then is – “how” do we do that? And at risk of playing too much on your Hollywood example, let’s go there…

It is about getting excited about who we are being NOW. Asking ourselves what gives us satisfaction and joy NOW? And what can we do NOW, WITH the vision, skills and relationships we have at our disposal which assist us to create the future we are living into, TODAY?

It’s a both/and again, not an either/or… As much about releasing what isn’t serving us as identifying and creating what we want instead. It’s about living with a vision into the future, and living it today…

And that can manifest in a variety of ways from participating more closely in each other’s work, to learning and teaching different subjects – as you phrased it, taking on the role of encouraging, convening, and engaging each other as leaders rather than talking each other down and talking trash about each other.

I for one look forward to working with you as a colleague toward this possibility. And to assist others to see for themselves, if that is what they choose to see and be, that such a “happy ending” truly IS possible!

In Spirit,
Tracey Sisson
Licensed Belief Re-patterningTM Practitioner
Calgary, AB Canada